My muse is gone...

I haven't written any stories or poems in oh, two years. Ever since I dealt with my childhood abuse and all that other crap that happened in my life, I haven't been able to write. And I miss it. Sometimes I wish I hadn't dealt with it. I loved writing. It was something I was good at. All those bad emotions, the anger, the hatred, the self-loathing, came out in some very beautiful, sometimes eye opening words. There would be days where I couldn't stop the flow of things that popped into my head. But now I have to force it out. Being emotionally healthy took away the inspiration I had for writing. Now, even sitting down to write a blog, one I want to be meaningful, is so hard that I don't post very many. I don't even write in my journal very much anymore. I think Niki writes more than I do and she's 6!! She has this cute little journal where she writes stories and songs. Sometimes she just writes a paragraph or two about her day or her family, or some little subject that she's chosen. Maybe she'll grow up to be an author? We'll see. During high school, writing was a huge part of who I was and now I'm left wondering, how do I get that back? I just don't feel whole without it. Maybe one day stuff will just start popping into my head again...