Saturday, November 15, 2008

Proposition 8 and Mormons...

I've been seething about this since November 4th. The great state of California passed Proposition 8 which changes the amendment to prohibit marriage between anyone but a man and a woman. This amendment didn't affect me. In fact, I couldn't have cared less if it had passed or not. What I'm sick of hearing is blaming the whole thing on the LDS church. CALIFORNIA passed the proposition, not the MORMONS!! In fact, the percentage of Mormons to all other religions in California is small. So again, it was the voters in California who passed it. The church simply took a stand on the issue. Telling Mormons they can't support a proposition that goes with their beliefs is like telling Oprah she can't support Barack Obama.

All the talk against the church wouldn't bug me so much if the gay alliance groups hadn't started smearing the missionaries. One of my best friends just got home from his mission. His mother died while he was gone. He came home for 10 days to say goodbye to her. He gave up the last month of her life to go back out and finish. To make a video showing two missionaries going into the home of a lesbian couple and tearing up their marriage certificate and trashing their house (which represented them taking away gay rights) took away from what these young men and women are doing. They sacrifice a good chunk of their lives to go teach something they strongly believe in. To say they only go out there to take away people's rights angered me in a way nothing ever has.

I'm one of the first to criticize some of the church's teachings. I've lived on both sides. I went from being a young women's leader to inactive. I went from wholeheartedly believing the stuff I taught the girls to questioning everything. I've had some very hard knocks in my life. One day I had this chubby, independent niece and the next I had a disabled one. And still, I went to church. Niki would go to Primary and Taci would come with me to young women's. Most of the time I would sit there and hold my practically newborn 1 year old niece. When she would become so frustrated because she couldn't get her body to move like it used to, she would scream. When I couldn't stand to hold her any longer because the pain became unbearable, Chris would take her. She would hold her, rock her, and whisper into her ear until she calmed down.

4 months after Taci's ordeal, I moved 45 minutes away from Chris. 5 months after that, my best friend calls and tells me that his mom's breast cancer is back after 10 years of remission. My best friend's mom was Chris. The one person who made me realize that it wasn't about my pain but about helping Taci deal with everything.

At this point, I was taking care of my two nieces but not of myself. I ended up in the hospital. I realized I was no good to anyone if I didn't learn how to take care of myself. Less than a week after that, Grandma and Grandpa moved me to New Mexico. I finally dealt with my childhood. I learned how to be healthy, emotionally.

One day almost exactly a year after hearing of Chris' cancer, I got another call. She's dying. I booked a flight as soon as I could. I had to say goodbye to probably the best person I had ever known. My best friend was there. I could tell that it was tearing him apart. I could see how much he hurt. And I ached for him. His mother, the most important person in his life was dying. And he only had a couple days to say goodbye. But I could also see the determination in his eyes. I could tell he would go back out there and keep sharing the gospel. He truly believed everything he was out there teaching. So after spending 10 days with his family, he went back. He missed his mom's final moments. He missed the funeral. He wasn't there to help comfort his dad and his sisters. He went through the grieving process out in the mission field. He sacrificed so much so he could teach people the beliefs that got him through the death of his mother.

When my Grandpa, the only father I had ever really had, died almost exactly a year from the day my best friend's mom died, he got me through. While still on his mission. He came home to a different life than he had left. Does this sound like a person trying to take away your rights? Someone who would go into your home and wreck everything?

They took it too far with this issue. Maybe the Mormon church shouldn't have taken a stand to support Proposition 8. That was church leaders who made that decision. I'm sick of people making assumptions. Of acting ignorant. There are churches who speak out on this issue every day. If you're gonna go after one, go after all of them. Stop blaming the Mormon church for something the voters in California did. The Mormon church isn't horrible. Maybe naive and idealistic. But they're not the only ones.. Give it a rest and move on. Take steps to get it over ruled or whatever you call it. Stop talking the talk and start walking the walk. Don't moan and groan. Take action. That's what democracy is about!!


63angel said...

Hi there, I have to agree with you on this one. I'm not LDS, but it did make me wonder why people in California would pass this if they didn't want it. And today when watching the news, I noticed one of the ladies in the picketing area holding a sign that said " Don't Bring Your Church(God)into Our State". What gets me is that if they want to do something, they are blaming the wrong ones. God is the one in control and the people of California spoke what they wanted. There were people from all over the nation watching this and praying on it. It didn't matter what religion you are. But I do think they are blaming the wrong ones and they need to look at themselves.

By the way... How is Casey doing? I have to say that out of all the people I know that is LDS and that went on a Mission, Casey truely beleived in his mission. I really admired that about him. So many times, I see people going because someone says they should, or they think they should. But Casey is the exception. Tell him I said hi when you hear from him or see him.

cutelilVictoria said...

It's good to know that there are other religions out there that understand where I'm coming from. I'm not a good Mormon. I haven't been for a long time, but to see people attacking the church like they are, I had to speak up. Thanks for the support, Sandie!

Lynseylou said...

Vicky, I love you! This was awesome. and I agree whole-heartedly